I don’t have to ‘mom’ like you, and that’s okay….
I’m not the mom that cuts food into beautiful shapes and creates an artwork master piece out of a packed lunch, and that’s okay. You may see a stray Mickey Mouse or snowman (“Olaf”) shaped pancake here and there, but that’s about it.
I’ve spent more of my adventure in motherhood feeling like I had to live up to this expectation of what being a mom is. That I had to make every single a moment an adventure. I’ve spent a lot of time questioning how I was doing everything. As mothers we have so much stress and a lot of it we put on ourselves by constantly comparing ourselves and our children to others and their offspring.
There is a parenting book on every topic imaginable, a Facebook group to go with it, a mom’s group, and countless posts and pictures from our fellow moms (that may or may not show the actual reality of their lives, like really how did you get everyone to look and smile for that family picture?!).
We have got to stop putting so much pressure on ourselves to be like everyone else. We have to stop assuming our children need to meet milestones at the same time as little Susie Lou down the street. Our children don’t have to fit into a mold and it’s not fair for us to create one for them, or for ourselves.
We should all mom in the best way that we know how, by loving and caring for our children; this is how I’m starting the new year. I’m starting the new year with a clear and open mind. I’m making a vow for less social media and more focus on our real life without constant comparison to others. I’m going into this year with a focus on what’s right for our family and what brings us happiness. Our version of happiness and our journey to get there will look different than anyone else’s and that’s perfectly fine, it should.
Our happiness is going to be dependent on us, not our comparison to the happiness of others, or their journey. I also vow to not judge this year because no matter what our journey through motherhood looks like, it’s a tough one. (…even though there’s a book, Facebook group, and an opinion for everything, motherhood still does not come with a instruction manual).
I’m not going to mom like you, and you’re not going to mom like me, and that’s okay. Let’s still meet for a playdate, and I promise to bring the coffee (because let’s face the reality that one thing we probably all need, no matter how we mom, is more sleep).
