Passionate About Pittsburgh
and the Moms Who Live Here

Letting Go of Mom Guilt for 2017

It’s hard to believe that it’s December and a new year is approaching quickly. As we get the holidays accomplished we move on to new changes we want to make.   This year, one of my goals is to let go of mom guilt and I hope it’s yours too.  One huge thing we have in common is that we all are moms.  We all, in some way, have experienced the highs and lows of being a parent.  There is still a lot of guilt and shame that comes with this.  Are we doing it right?  Seeing “perfect” family photos on your timeline tug at your heart strings because you wish you could have that.  In reality none of us are doing it wrong, every single one of us are so unique there is no way that there is only one right way to do it.  Being a parent is hard enough, don’t make it more difficult by being hard on yourself.  Keep reading for advice on kicking mom guilt to the curb for 2017 and the years after.

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Stop Comparing Yourself To Others – We live in such an interesting time.  Social media is so big, most of us use it on a daily basis.  One of the biggest things people share is their family.  While it’s great to have and use, it can be easy to fall prey to comparing yourself to what you see.  Your coworker posts her kids having a great time with a clean house in the background.  You like it, of course, but on the inside you wonder what you’re doing wrong because you can’t imagine a clean house and kids playing at the same time.  While you’re hard on yourself about why you can’t do both, you had no idea she hires a cleaning lady to do it for her.  It’s so easy to get sucked into the perception of things that you lose focus on you.  This new year stop comparing yourself to other moms and love what you have. It will really make a difference on your happiness.

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Take A Stand And Be Firm – Becoming a new mom is one of the most nerve rattling things you can do.  You have this little human with no instructions and all you know is you want to give them the very best.  It can be intimidating, but after a while you learn the ropes and what works for you and your family.  There must be something about a new mom that makes everyone experts and you must listen and do what they say. False.  Do not let anyone guilt you about the choices you make for your child.  I wish I had known this, because people, including family, will try very hard to make you feel bad if you aren’t doing it their way.  If they’re trying to hard, don’t be afraid to bring out the mama bear in you if you have too.  Being a mom is challenging on its own.  We don’t need people adding to our plate if it isn’t helpful.  Having confidence and a strong backbone can help kick mom guilt to the curb.

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Know Your Boundaries –  We all have a super mom in us.  Our schedules are jam packed, yet we find a way to make it all happen.  Have you ever tried to do way to much and end up not really accomplishing anything at all?  I have.  I tried working 2 jobs, being a full time mom, keeping the house clean, part time writer, the list can keep going.  Then one day I realized I’m not really getting anything done because I had way to much on my plate.  This caused me to feel even more guilty because I failed at doing everything.  Please save yourself and learn from my mistakes.  While it does feel awesome to do it all, realistically we all need help.  It doesn’t have to be about  getting help, saying no is just as important.  Don’t be afraid to say no and stay home if that’s what you want to do.  Knowing your boundaries gives you strength to control what you are willing to do, giving you freedom from feeling guilty from what you won’t. 2016 is almost over sending in a new year with new opportunities. I pray you crush any goals you have and that you create loving moments with your family.  

Do you have any resolutions you’d like to share?  Please comment below and share this post for any mommies that need a positive kick.  See you next year!

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