“Because I said so!” “Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about!” Many of us heard these rants countless times throughout our childhood and adolescence. Coupled with such tirades was the discipline structure of punishment and rewards. As the mother of a 3 year old and 1 year old, it didn’t take me long at all to come to the realization that this style of parenting was NOT going to work for my children, and it was going to give me a full head of gray hairs by the age of 35.
What is positive discipline?
Positive discipline are principles that are “designed to teach young people to become responsible, respectful and resourceful members of their communities. Positive Discipline teaches important social and life skills in a manner that is deeply respectful and encouraging for both children and adults.”
What positive discipline is NOT
Positive discipline gets confused with permissiveness. It’s almost as if some parents think, the meaner they are, the more effective they are when in most cases, it’s quite the contrary. Whenever we (parents) get to the point where we are yelling and reacting to a situation as apposed to responding to it, we are no longer in control of ourselves nor are we in control of the situation. Boundaries, rules and limits can be set for our children in a positive manner that encourages and promotes learning experiences for them. Being a school teacher gave me a first-hand glimpse into just how effective positive discipline can be for our children, building character along the way. Now that I am a mother, I am on a mission to learn how to discipline my girls in a way that build them up, not tear them down.
When we know better, we do better. Perhaps that’s one of the many aspects of parenting that I’ve fallen in love with; parents are lifelong learners. There is no manual on how to parent and if there were, there would be as many manuals as there are human beings; each child is different and as a result, has different needs. Let’s not just survive this parenting gig; let’s thrive and help our children to do the same, and positive discipline can help us accomplish this awesome task.
To learn more about positive discipline, visit www.positivediscipline.com
