Thirty years ago, today, the man who would one day become my husband and the father of my child was born. I’ve only been fortunate enough to know him for twenty percent of his life, but its been an eventful twenty percent.
Prior to meeting Charlie, I often wondered if I would end up getting married, and what my potential future husband would be like. I wasn’t a long-term relationship girl. After zn average of three months, I would either dump or be dumped. I hadn’t ever hit the one-year mark with a guy I dated.
Then Charlie came into my life. We had our normal ups and downs, but he loved me without conditions or boundaries. I fell in love with him quickly, and held on tightly.
Four years later, we welcomed our beautiful baby boy. In the chaos of parenting a vivacious one-year old toddler, I often forget to express my gratitude toward my husband for the many things he does daily to make my life a little bit better.
He makes me feel beautiful. I’ve heard women say this one before, but I never fully understood it until my body was ravaged by pregnancy. Where once was tight, smooth skin, there now are stretch marks and softness. I used to do my makeup nicely most days. Now, it’s the exception and not the rule. Regardless of these changes, he still tells me how beautiful I am, and says it sincerely.
He makes me laugh. My husband loves to make people laugh, often with incredibly silly jokes. Even when my day has been heavy and I feel burdened by life, my husband comes through with the right thing to say or do to make me laugh.
He holds down the fort. When I push myself to the point of being desperate for down-time, he quickly steps in and takes over, without complaint. Last month, when I faced the devastating loss of a parent, he took over household and parenting responsibilities without a word, and he continues to pull more than his fair share so that I can take a mental break or take care of responsibilities outside of our home.
He loves our son ferociously. He probably won’t like me saying this, but he doubted his ability to be a good parent before we got married. He wasn’t sure if he wanted children, because he wasn’t sure he could be a good dad. I’m happy to report that he’s not just a good dad, he’s absolutely fantastic. He has a patience and a protectiveness that make my heart swell. When I hear my boys giggling in the living room, I silently thank God that I found someone who is so good to our child.
He never stops trying. Relationships are about daily choices, and sometimes it feels like it might be easier to just give up and let things unravel. Luckily, I have a partner who will fight with me and for me, and talk through the hurdles until we come to a resolution.
I didn’t land a perfect husband. Like any couple, we have moments where we want to strangle each other. I’m lucky though. I can honestly say that I love the man that I married, and want to keep choosing him every day.
Happy birthday to my dear husband Charlie. I hope your next 30 years are even better than the first.