The following was something I wrote one night after a particularly challenging day with my toddler. I had no intention of using it for a PMB post, but then I thought I can’t be the only one who feels this way. Strong willed children can be challenging (to say the least) but it is so amazing to think of how far they will go in life. At the end of a hard day of toddler parenting sometimes it’s all we can do to just laugh and cross our fingers that tomorrow is a little easier.
Dear Daughter –
You are my greatest joy and my biggest struggle. Your sweetness, laughter, smile, and bouncing curls light up my life, but your strong will, sass, and toddler attitude can push me to my limit in seconds.
You are my biggest obstacle. You see some days I miss the sweet infant who was always smiling and happy. I could take her anywhere she was laid back and just went with the flow. I often wish that I would have cherished those days just a little more. Now at almost three years old, you have more days filled with attitude than not. You are good at letting me know your feelings about our day. Some days you are happy with our (my) choices, but you are sure good at letting me know when you are not.
One moment you beaming with sunshine and sparkles, and then next it’s like a tidal wave of tantrums that I never saw coming. I know I don’t always say the right thing, but I’m trying. I don’t always keep a calm voice, but I’m working on it.
My Daughter you have created some of my most treasured and happy memories, but have also made me question my abilities as a parent (often within the same minute). You challenge me in ways that I never thought possible. You make me notice my strengths, but (more importantly) you push me to realize and correct my flaws. You make me want to be better in every way. I want to be someone you want to be.
I don’t want to thwart your big personality and strong will, but I do want to raise a respectable child. I want you to know your limits, but push them appropriately. I want you to understand your emotions and channel your energy in a positive manner. I know a lot of this will make more sense when you are older; for now it would just be nice for you to listen the first (or even the second or third) time. For you to use your words to express your emotions, rather than tantrums that don’t always make sense.
I know you are still young, have so far to go, and (we both) have so much to learn. With each step we take I want you to remember that I’m trying. With each misstep I’m learning. And, I don’t want you for even a second to question if I have your back. I do.
You are my biggest, greatest and most challenging obstacle this is one thing I know for sure. I may not be perfect, but that’s okay and know that when I look at the smile on your face as you say “I love you Mom” at the end of night.
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